The Human Brain Troubleshooting Guide is out.

You wonderful people send in many questions every day about the wonderfully extravagant features of those luxury thought appliances in your head, so we figured it’d be a good idea to put together The Human Brain Troubleshooting Guide, full of frequently asked questions and even more frequently given answers. It also includes awesome infographics illustrated with whales and alpacas. 

This guide really should’ve been included with your brain when you bought it, but given that you’ve probably worn out the warranty on that beast by now, this is a better-late-than-never-kinda-thing.

Do not attempt to remove your squishy urge blob. Blowing on it and sticking it back in will not improve the quality of the images you see. Unboxing a brain without supervision will certainly void the warranty.

Luxury Features

The first half of the guide explores some of the luxury features that come standard on your exclusive human brain, like intrusive thoughts, anxiety, false memories, depersonalization, and ultra fine panic attacks. Some of these features can be overwhelming so, like learning which fork to start with when you’re dining with the Queen, we’ll share some tips on making it look like somebody actually taught you how to use that thing in your skull.

Using Your Brain

The second half of the guide looks at some of the more useful ways you might use that power tool in your head. You can use it to excel at practices like meditation and mindfulness, gratitude, living according to your values, and even loving yourself. You may have a lot of experience judging and hating yourself, which is totally one of the ways you can choose to use your brain, and the guide will explain how to do that if you haven’t already mastered that, but it may come as a surprise to many brain owners to learn that they can use those things for being kind and compassionate towards themselves.